A recent reminder arrived courtesy of the daily horoscope column in my local newspaper.

Though you love to take care of others, do not do this to such an extent that they forget how to take care of themselves.  They’ll only resent you for it later.

Hmmmm.  Lovely words of wisdom.

And the potential benefits are endless – for both the caregiv-er AND the caregiv-ee.

What are YOUR experiences?

wow, isn’t it interesting that this year, both my house (which turned 100 years old this year) AND my car (which just logged 100,000 miles) are “demanding” somewhat expensive–and ALWAYS unexpected presents from me!

So, my schedule the next day now included an unexpected “car-less” time period along with an “away-from-home” meeting, a 90 minute conference call as well as “walking / get coffee / be productive somehow / just be” time.

My first thought was that I had two choices about how to approach the day.  Either I could whine and moan about being stuck without my usual transportation and flexibility, OR I could bring a sense of interested curiosity, while inviting the day to unfold in a new way.

Grateful that I chose the 2nd option, along the way I…..

• Discovered the still fairly new Wanderer’s Teahouse in downtown East Lansing that I had read about some time back but hadn’t specifically figured out its location.  I met the owners, Elizabeth and Michael while enjoying a GREAT cup of coffee [I know, it's a teahouse--but I was in need of some serious caffeine that morning!].  I also learned about a cool-sounding “Drumming and Tea” workshop series they’re hosting later this month that I plan to attend.
• Thoroughly enjoyed walking throughout the summer-quiet Michigan State University Campus on a luscious July morning.
• Remembered two special trips (Oakland, CA and Portland, OR) where I could easily walk to nearby grocery stores and restaurants AND a spa!!
• Pondered adding “walkable/livable community” to the list of criteria I’m beginning to create if/when I ever decide to move away from Lansing.
• Considered the possibility/feasibility /desirability of actually scheduling (and reporting about) periodic “serendipity” days.
• Brainstormed possible names for such days (e.g., “opposite” days, lemon-aide days, stretch-ful days, day at the edge, etc.)

All in all, my experiment of a day at the edge of serendipity turned out to be a refreshingly, stretch-full, lemon-aide type of day.

And now, I’m a bit curious….about YOU….

• How do YOU handle potentially frustrating routine-changing events?
• Do you ever schedule your own “serendipity” days?
• If so, what discoveries have you made along the way?

You can leave a comment (below) or send me a private email.

I look forward to hearing from you!

Today is going to require a LOT of deep breathing.

Which inspired me to relish some lovely breathing space of my own for a few moments.   Ah…….

Which further inspired me to record a  musical Meditation on Breathing by Sarah Dan Jones :  BreatheIn-BreatheOut **

It’s actually a musical round with 3 parts (except I sang/recorded each line separately–someday, maybe I’ll record a trio with myself !)

1. a simple single-pitched “drone” part of “breathe in….breathe out”
2. the melody line – “when I breathe in, I breathe in peace….when I breathe out, I breathe out love.”
3. the descant line – same text as the melody

 I invite you to listen…..and breathe…….and maybe even sing along – choosing which part you feel most comfortable singing.  And, if you’re willing – let me know how that feels inside……

* I found a lovely, related composition/recording by Sarah Dan Jones online, entitled When I Breathe In  that uses this melody as the chorus.

** Interesting how popular the theme of “breathing in, breathing out” is.  A quick google search included the following:

• Matt Kearney’s Breathe In, Breathe Out [actually, I kinda liked this song!]
• Chris Cagle’s I Breathe In, I Breathe Out [country]
• St. Lunatics (Ali), Breathe in, Breathe Out [rap]

And here’s another invitation - as you listen to any/all of the songs, notice if (and/or how) each one resonates differently inside you.

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A Love Letter from Alex (printable/pdf version)

Some days it really pays to sort through old files.  This afternoon, I found a stack of love letters and cards from my late husband.

He wrote an especially beautiful letter at a point during our courtship when I was going through a really rough patch at work.  I thought you might find his words as comforting-and inspirational–as I did.   Both then, and now:

I send you my affection and love to be with you….keep us close together during the trying times….calling on our total energies to help you through….but also call on our combined energies and love when it is time to celebrate at the high times of each day – there should be at least 8 celebrations each day….

1. When you awake…to another day, the purr of a cat, to the sneeze of [the dog], to the song of birds or to the first ray of sunlight.
2. Sipping a cup of tea, munching on a crust of toast, peanut butter or crunching a dry cereal for breakfast.
3. Taking a walk in the out-of-doors regardless of snow, rain, sleet, sun, or cottonwood seeds gliding down to earth, smelling the scents of earth, water, cut grass, sweat of a horse, after shave lotion, fresh dab of perfume or baby oil.
4. Greetings from friends, acquaintances, students, strangers, passer-bys, your own image reflected in a mirror or storefront window.  Surprize….being alive to all which surrounds you each moment in each day.
5. Listening and hearing the sounds of your own voice…talking, yelling, singing, laughing, whispering.
6. Touching…oh so many objects, people, animals, buildings, your car, a flower, a caterpillar, the wine in your goblet, the lips of your lover….your own body….with pride, delight and passion.
7. To be emotional….full range and depth…no limit…full limit…restrained and then abounding…internal and external-Yeah!  Take it in…Give and let it out….Human and Full of Life.
8. To sleep and rest after a fantasy called life which has been experienced….throughout each day.

That my Mary Is what you do!  Each and Every day of your creative and beautiful life.  Celebrate the existence of yourself with each and every living creature-

I too will celebrate life with you….each day and each moment of that day-

I enjoy spending these seconds with you.

*****

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Image Credits:

Love Letters by Patricia Lazar on Flickr (cc) Some Rights Reserved

Here in the US, we often take our water quality for granted. Except in case of dire emergencies, we simply walk to the closest faucet to turn on the tap for fresh, clean drinking water.

I first learned about the challenges of getting clean drinking water in the developing world in 1967 (at age 17) during my first of several visits to Nicaragua. For example, we had to use bottled water for drinking and brushing our teeth. When visiting in a Nicaraguan home, we were told to request a bottle of soda whenever we were offered a beverage to drink. Strange by today’s standards, but a sugary soda was healthier to drink than water!

During a 3-week stay in a rural district in northwest Nicaragua, we had to haul water from the river to fill barrels in the outdoor shower stalls (unless we had a drenching rainstorm). Eating lettuce-based salads were out of the question because of the high risk of intestinal illnesses. So, instead, we scalded cabbage in boiling water–which we then cooled down with chunks of ice (a foolhardy and risky shortcut, since we later realized that the ice was also made with contaminated water!).

Several years ago, Rotary International launched the BioSand Water Filter project which has helped to provide point-of-use water filtration units to villages throughout the developing world. These economical, low-tech units are remarkably effective in removing most bacteria and parasites from contaminated water, making clean drinking water more readily accessible.

I just learned about another intriguing project: PlayPump which focuses it efforts in sub-Saharan Africa. There are several really great videos on YouTube that describe the project–which uses children’s play-power to operate water pumps from village wells.

Such creative projects and remarkable ingenuity!

(note: The title quote is from Silas Marner’s Rime of the Ancient Mariner)

(note: image from Foxypar4 !!! on Flickr, some rights reserved)

The lyrics from the old standard, I Won’t Dance have been stuck in my head the past several days.

I won’t dance, don’t ask me. I won’t dance…with you. My heart won’t let my feet do things that they should do.

This past weekend, I received a couple of requests for charitable donations:

• An organic food retailer whose business I try to support was under “house arrest” as part of a non-profit organization’s annual fundraising drive, and so was soliciting “bail” funds to earn her release from jail.
• A dear friend sent an email inviting me to join a walk for another non-profit organization that serves individuals who have the specific disease her son has.

Especially in these hard economic times, it’s difficult to say no to someone in need. As a matter of fact, when I heard that a family I know (with 3 children), who lost all of their belongings when the apartment complex they lived in was destroyed by a (3am!) fire last week, I couldn’t get my checkbook and email notifications going fast enough.

And it’s really not so much about the money or even about turning down an opportunity for a lovely walk with people whose company I would no doubt enjoy.

So what’s the difference–and why does my heart stop me from participating in one instance and not another?

I’m like an ocean wave that’s bumped on the shore, I feel so absolutely stumped on the floor.

Over the past several years, I have come to the decision to stop contributing money or participating in fund-raising activities to disease-oriented organizations. It’s not that I don’t care about the individuals who are affected by any of these specific diseases. It’s more about the fact that we live in a culture that tends to identify and label individuals more by their disease (or other “shortcomings). So much so that we often lose sight of the wondrous being that they are (and continue to be) in spite of their personal challenges.

Ring-a-ding-ding, you’re lovely.

Over the years, my focus has shifted elsewhere. For me, disease is but a “context”, a sub-text in a person’s life. Instead, I try to focus my life and my work on what can be lovely (even if it means looking underneath and around what’s not obviously so).

So now, when someone asks, here’s what I am able to offer (with a light heart and gracious step): a gift certificate for a Basic “Barebones” Stresswell™ Appraisal plus a complimentary coaching session.

You know what? You’re lovely….you’re so lovely….and that’s why I won’t dance.

(note: image from liltree on Flickr)